For Millennials and Gen X parents: Raising your children in the UU tradition

Research shows that many Millennial and Gen X parents are turning spiritual development inside out. Baby Boomers and Traditionalists often followed the religious tradition of their families and raised their own children in the same tradition. Millennial parents have put their own preferences first and then search for a religious tradition that matches. They have different needs, desires, and expectations of themselves and the programs in which they engage their children.

Researchers found evidence that a decline in church attendance and participation in programming is harming the vitality of the church (Barna Group, 2014). Nieuwhof (2015) found that Millennials revealed several major reasons for the decline in church attendance. In Nieuwhof’s (2015) research, Millennials reported irrelevance (lack of meaning) and leadership issues, including hypocrisy and moral failure. Raines and Arnsparger (2010) pointed out that Millennials put great emphasis on competent and trustworthy leadership. Millennials have a hopeful outlook and place value on open communication, respect, and frequent opportunities to learn in their way. Raines and Arnsparger’s research supported Nieuwhof’s (2015) findings on why some Millennials are no longer showing up at church. Raines (2003) identified an alternative to the well-known Golden Rule-do unto others as you would have them do unto you. An adaptation and more appropriate phrase for Millennials would be the “Titanium Rule-do unto others, keeping their preferences in mind” (p. 34).

After hearing several perspectives of Millennial and Gen X parents in interviews, I tried to keep those preferences in mind while I developed the new RE engagement pilot program with my innovator team. Many of you mentioned the desire for resources on how to raise children in the UU tradition.

I recently came across an article written by Meg Cox 18 years ago entitled, New family traditions. I feel it is an excellent resource for claiming a UU identity for your family.

by Amy Huntereece, PhD ABD, M. Ed.

March 10, 2021

References

Barna Group. (2014). In G. Barna & D. Kinnaman (Eds.), Churchless: Understanding today's unchurched and how to connect with them. Tyndale House Publishers, Inc.

Nieuwhof, C. (2015). Lasting impact: 7 powerful conversations that will help your church grow. The reThink Group, Inc.

Raines, C. (2003). Connecting generations: The sourcebook for a new workplace. Crisp Publications.

Raines, C., & Arnsparger, A. (2010). Millennials at work. https://www.generationsatwork.com/millennials-at-work/