Welcome to the new addition to this blog space. I will be here for the next couple of weeks. My hope is to provide support and guidance for you as a parent or caregiver who wants to raise children in the UU tradition but is not quite sure where to begin.
In his book, School Renewal, Finser (2001) strongly advocated parenting with certainty from a place of faith and love. Finser (2001) pointed out that "external society often seeks to make us content with things that can be possessed; faith leads us beyond. Faith leads, and our inner self is nourished through devotion" (p. 50). Devotion to the formation of one's faith development as a UU emphasizes a “free and responsible search for truth and meaning” (UUA, 2019, p. 1). So you may ask, "But how can I advocate for a 'free and responsible search for truth and meaning' if I don't even know where to start"? That is what this space is for. Ask questions, curiously contemplate, and engage in conversation.
Adults who actively pursue spiritual development will naturally hold spiritual development as a goal for their children. Kohn (2014) offered, goals for our children "should include a meta-goal: We want them to be thoughtful enough to formulate meaningful goals for themselves. And whatever they come up with ultimately must supersede our goals for them" (p. 193). So, as a result of aiming for healthy spiritual development for their children, parents need resources and guidance to pursue that goal.
Spiritually mindful adults feel a sense of responsibility to provide opportunities for faith development to their children. The home is the ideal context to learn about those ideas and reach for those goals. Kabat-Zinn (1997) worked with everyday mindful parenting and recognized the importance of mindful parenting intentions. Kabat-Zinn (1997) said, “The challenge of mindful parenting is to find ways to nourish our children and ourselves…to grow into who we all are and can become for each other, for ourselves, and for the world” (p. 378). Mindful parenting and spiritually guiding children require courage. You can do this. I am here for you!
Klink (1972), thinking ahead of her time, argued that the parent is the best teacher for faith formation and said, “From the religious point of view, …parents must set aside the layman’s feeling of inferiority. They… are… the right people to introduce the child to the world of faith” (p. 213). Finding support in the church community will foster courage and dispel feelings of inferiority.
If you do not see yourself as a teacher, the words guide, mentor, or enforcer may fit better. The terms do not matter as much as the intention. I look forward to working together to raise kind, conscientious, and loving humans.
February 20, 2021
by Amy Huntereece, PhD ABD, M. Ed.
References
Finser, T. (2001). School renewal. Anthroposophic Press.
Kabat-Zinn, J. (1997). Everyday blessings: The inner work of mindful parenting. Hyperion.
Klink, J. (1972). Your child and religion. John Knox Press.
Kohn, A. (2014). The myth of the spoiled child: Challenging the conventional wisdom about children and parenting. Da Capo Press.
UUA. (2019). Unitarian Universalist Bylaws and Rules. https://www.uua.org/files/pdf/u/uua_bylaws_2019.pdf